Chapter 24

Robbie's POV

Wiping away the band of sweat from my eyebrows, it doesn't feel real. Mark stares vaguely at his knee which is resting on the bed beside me. Did he even say that? Or am i just hearing which could be said one day? "S...sorry, what?" Finally after a whole 5 minutes of silence, i'm the first to speak.
"You know what i said, Robbie." His voice quietens each time he speaks, causing Gary's heart rate to increase, almost as if his heart is pounding against the bed underneath the pair of us.
"And i don't know what you mean by it? I haven't seen Gary today."
"Will you please just stop lying?!" For the first time, something inside of Mark snaps, like he's had enough of the games. Mark is the type of man to take things on his shoulders, he can carry problems around for years without complaining, but now... now it's like he's a whole different man. "There's no point pretending anymore... just say it... admit it?" Closing my eyes, i take a long intake of breath. What can i do? There's no escaping, Gary is under the bed. "I can easily look under the bed, i know i'll find a middle aged, blonde, Northern male under there."

Surprisingly, i'm suddenly calm over the matter, to be honest i'm annoyed that i'm being questioned like i'm a criminal. Its mine and Gary's lives, why do we have to be treated like this by one of our closest friends?
"And what gives you that idea? I mean why the hell would Gary be hiding underneath my bed?" Snapping at the smaller male, i hoist myself up in bed by my elbows. Not saying a word, carefully Mark raises a finger, pointing into the direction of Gary's flip flops, which have been placed on the floor. Of course, its obvious.
"Not your style, ay Rob?" A curvy smile appears on his glum looking face. Feeling defeated, i let go, there's no other way to get out of this.

"When did you find out?"
"Maybe...we should talk? Just the three of us? Gaz... laying under there isn't going to do any favours for your back..." Lifting up the duvet, the pair of us wait for Gary to slide from under the bed. After a minute or two, he also finally surrenders.
"Bet you guys hate us now, for lying." Gary stands at the side of the bed, acting like a school boy who's about to get yelled at.
"No." Mark's jaw almost drops to his knees in shock. "Never could we hate you, either of you... i guess... i mean... I'm disappointed." Hearing our friend's words, i sense the guilt coming from Gary's hurting body. Dropping onto the edge of the bed, his hands run over his aching face.
"We...we didn't mean for it to come out like this, Mark."
"You could of told us, Gaz. We're your friends and i guess that's why we're upset over it all. We've all been there for one another since the band was put together..."
Sliding closer to Gary, i place a supportive hand onto his back. "For once... we wanted to enjoy something. Neither of us knew things would lead to this, but its bloody beautiful what me and Gary have. We were going to confess, you guys first, family then the fans. After speaking last night, today we were actually going to tell you and that's the honest truth."
"It didn't look like you were going to confess... why would Gary hide under the bed?"
"Because-"
"Why the questions? Does it matter if we were going to confess or not? We're middle age men, stop treating us like we're kids. You of all people, i thought you would be the most understanding, you've always been there for me and you've always been there for Robbie. Do you not like that two men are attracted to one another?!" Loudly Gary snaps.

Mark acts like a mirror to my emotions. "N...no... of course i don't have a problem with that Gary. I'm happy that you two are happy its just-"
"The reason why we didn't tell anyone was, because we didn't want anyone to interfere! I'm new to all these feelings, I've missed Robbie and i don't want to muck things up. I'm scared."
"I understand you, Gaz. I really do." Edging closer to Gary, i notice his tear stained face behind his palms. "But-"
Gary cuts in again. "There's no buts Mark! ....ugh... Just go... i can't be doing with this at the moment...my head is fucked and I'm going to make decisions I'm going to regret later on." Mark looks up at me, unsure what to say or do. Passing over a soft friendly smile, i nod towards the door, as my hand continues to stroke Gary's back for comfort.
"Ok... I'll go, but the lads want us to all have a chat tonight around 7ish... please do whatever you can to convince one another to come along. I'm always going to support your decisions Gary... i made a promise that i would be there for you no matter what when Robbie left... and same to you Rob... i love you both with all my heart, never would i want to see either of you upset..." He pats the top of my hand which still rests on Gary's back. "Give us a text to let us know you're coming...that's all i ask... sorry again." With that, Mark disappears out of the door, leaving me and Gary alone once again.

Gary's hands remain over his face, hiding his upset over all this. "Coffee?" Quietly i mutter. A gentle nod is all i get from the smaller male. "We're in this together, Gaz. I'm never going to leave you...again... i promise you..." Planting a kiss against his neck, i squeeze his hand before drifting towards the kitchen, still with a wobbly head. A sickness swirls around my stomach, causing my throat to feel heavy, almost as if its blocked preventing my speech. Taking deep breathes i hold onto the worktop, with my mouth hovering over the sink. "What's happening to me?" It feels as if I've just ran an four hour marathon. Blackness covers my eyes, a blindfold? No surly? I'm hallucinating?
"Rob?" Blurriness blocks my view. "Rob...are you OK?" The voice gets deeper and deeper until its inaudible.
"H...Hel..." Groaning loudly, i step backwards searching for the worktop for support, until i feel myself falling. My head forcefully makes contact with the stone kitchen tile flooring, creating complete darkness.